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The Orgasmic Brain - Why Women Need A Relaxed Mind To Climax, Study Reveals

12/27/2021

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Study reveals that part of a women's brain turns off during orgasm, and anxiety can prevent women from reaching that elusive orgasm. Some women are also able to climax without physical touch, a phenomenon known as the mind orgasm.
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The Orgasmic Brain 
 
For a woman’s brain to get turned on sexually, another part of the brain has to turn off, according to a Dutch study of the brains of men and women during orgasm.
 
The study was undertaken in 2005 by neuroscientists at the Univerity of Groningen, in the Netherlands, where they used brain scans to map what happened in men’s and women's minds while their partners sat by their bodies, sexually stimulating them.
 
The study involved 13 women and 11 men aged 19 to 39. Women told the researchers when they faked orgasm, but the truth was there on the scans anyway. Having an orgasm is, for women at least, an event that takes place in the mind. Large parts of their brains that deal with emotion and fear appear to shut down so that they can climax.
 
What Is An Orgasm?
 
The orgasm is a fairly brief event that occurs in the mind and felt in the body. There is no agreed definition of an orgasm amongst medical professionals as it is a subjective experience referring to an intensely pleasurable sexual experience, often considered the peak or climax of sexual excitement.
 
Some people describe an orgasm as a “sense of euphoria,” “heavenly bliss,” “pleasurable rush over the body,” “complete joy,” “mind-blowing release,” “wonderful explosion of pleasure.” “sexual high.” “pure pleasure and peace” “volcano erupting,” “overwhelming feeling,” “indescribable feel-good sensations,” “like you’re flying.” “psychosomatic circle” “ecstasy,” “sensual relief,” “out-of-body experience,” and “heart-pumping fun.”
 
Orgasms trigger the release of dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin, which also lower blood pressure. It can help to limit stress and tension, as well as relieving pain in the body.  

The Mind Orgasm
 
A mind orgasm, is also known as a mental, or fantasy orgasm. They can happen through stimulation of the largest sexual organ – the brain. The is what generally happens when you have an orgasm whilst sleeping. Some women can experience an orgasm from a conversation without any physical touch. Mind orgasms are brought via intimate thoughts and exploratory fantasies, nestled deep within the mind. “The orgasm for a woman is mental,” says sexual health educator, Angelica Lindsey-Ali.
 
Some women can orgasm without physical touch. It is known as a mental orgasm. For many women, to have a mental orgasm, requires having a still mind and thinking intensely about things that turn them on. Some women are able to have a mental orgasm by thinking about their intimate partner or listening to seductive words from their husband.       


The mind orgasm is one of fourteen orgasms women can experience, as outlined in the book Kunyaza: The Secret to Female Pleasure
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Woman’s Brain Turns Off During Orgasm
 
Professor Gert Holstege reported the findings at a conference in Copenhagen, Denmark, organised by the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology.
 
"The main thing we saw was deactivation in women," he said. "It was unbelievable, very pronounced. I think that is the major outcome of the study. You see extreme deactivation of large portions of the brain, especially the fear centres, the brain that controls emotions."
 
The main part of the brain that seemed active was the cerebellum, linked to control of movement, but scientists also think it may have an emotional role. This was active in fake orgasms too, but otherwise there was a different picture.
 
"If you look at women that faked orgasm you see the same kind of thing in the cerebellum, but the cortex, the conscious part of the brain, is also active," Holstege said.
 
Anxiety and Overthinking Stops Orgasm

It is important that the level of anxiety and fear in the mind needs to be subdued and in control in order for a woman to orgasm, says the author of the study. High levels of stress, worry, and overthinking can prevent a woman from reaching the big-O.  

Many women find it difficult to climax with their partner because they struggle to get out of their head and stop overthinking during intimacy. 

How To Orgasm
 
To orgasm, women needed to ensure that fear and stress did not get in the way. "The deactivation of these very important parts of the brain might be the most important thing necessary to have an orgasm. If you are in a high level of anxiety it is very hard to have sex [and orgasm]."
 
As the women were stimulated, activity rose in one sensory part of the brain, called the primary somatosensory cortex, but fell in the amygdala and hippocampus, areas involved in alertness and anxiety. During orgasm, activity fell in many more areas of the brain, including the prefrontal cortex, compared with the resting state.
 
The study confirmed what is already commonly known, that women are more likely to orgasm when they are relaxed and free from worries and distractions. “Fear and anxiety levels have to go down for orgasm. Everyone knows this but we can see it happening in the brain,” he explained.
 
A man can help a woman reach climax by creating a safe, secure and comfortable environment when intimate. Every woman is capable of orgasming with a man, but it may take some work and patience.
 
Many preorgasmic women have experienced a mind-blowing orgasm once they have figured out what turns them on and received the right type of stimulation they need to orgasm. Mindfulness can also help a woman overcome mental blockages to orgasming.
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Kunyaza, discover the African way to squirt orgasms!

12/26/2021

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Want to learn an African way to squirt waterfalls? Well, you can, with the ancient technique from Rwanda called kunyaza! The principle of the technique is simple. The man takes hold of his erect penis, and taps it against the woman's clitoris and labia in a rhythmic fashion. He can increases the tapping tempo and alternate between circular and zigzagging movements. The woman allows the water to flow freely.
Myths and traditions
The origin of the technique dates back to the Third Dynasty of the pre-colonial Kingdom of Rwanda, Nyanza being the capital city at the time. The story goes that a lonely queen was very much in the mood for sex while her husband was away on a military expedition. She summoned one of her male guards to satisfy her sexual needs. 

Waterfall
The poor man was terrified and held his penis with trembling hands in an attempt to penetrate the queen. His penis rubbed up and down against her lady parts and he constantly tapped her clitoris and labia. The tapping motion brought so much pleasure to the queen the she had a squirting orgasm. The huge waterfall that came out of her formed one of the largest lakes in East Africa. When the king came back, the queen asked him to make the same tapping motion with his penis. And that’s how the kunyaza technique was born. The kunyaza tradition gets passed down from one generation to the other.​
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Sexual rite

For kunyaza, men are taught how to tap and rub the top of their penis on the clitoris and labia. Traditionally, Rwandan men feel ashamed if they are unable to bring their wife to a wet climax. In Rwanda, sex is not just about penetration and male lust. On the contrary, the man has to pleasure the woman and satisfy her. 

Impact of kunyaza 

According to Angelica Lindsey Ali, an American sexual health educator, kunyaza is the easiest and most effective way of achieving female ejaculation. Rwandan sexologist Vestine Dusabe reported that ninety percent of women can learn how to squirt with this technique.

In a BBC-documentary about kunyaza, we see how Vestine tries to keep the tradition alive in the quickly modernising urban areas of Rwanda. She teaches sex education to teenage girls and reminds them how lucky they are to live in a country where girls are not circumcised: ‘Here in Rwanda, the female experience of sexuality is part of our culture.’ In Rwanda, female pleasure is sacred.
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The Kunyaza technique

To give a woman kunyaza, a man needs patience and practice to be able to achieve a mind-blowing squirting climax. A man’s role is essential in this: he is the one who has to pleasure you in a way that makes your water flow. In the BBC documentary, a woman even said she would throw her husband under the bed if he wasn’t able to make her squirt!

Arousing teamwork

Female ejaculation is something that both partners have to surrender to. In the classic Kunyaza position, the man sits on the bed or on the floor and the woman positions herself on his lap. If this doesn’t work for you, of course you can also lie on your back while your partner kneels between your knees.

The basic principle is quite simple. The man holds his penis and uses the glans to tap the clitoris, the labia and the vaginal opening. He starts by stimulating the inner labia and slowly works his way to the inside of the labia and the opening of the vagina. Then he stimulates the clitoris, the labia and the vagina at an increasing speed. He can alternate rhythmic tapping with circular and zigzagging movements.

Penetration

Although kunyaza is primarily a non-penetrative practice, there are variations of the practice involving sexual penetration. Alternating between short, small thrusts and long, deep thrusts, the man can make sure the clitoris glands are intensely stimulated. He can also move the tip of his penis in circles against the vaginal wall for more stimulation. He should hold his penis between his index finger and middle finger while thrusting and circling. He can even write his name long her vulva.

Book

To read more about the sexual history of Rwanda and the kunyaza technique to give a woman squirting orgasms, read the book Kunyaza: The Secret to Female Pleasure by Habeeb Akande 


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Sexual Satisfaction In Women Increase with Age (After 40)

12/11/2021

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Women grow increasingly satisfied with their sex lives after they turn 40, according to a study  published by American Journal of Medicine.

A survey of 1,303 sexually active older women found that sexual satisfaction in women increases with age and those not engaging in sex are satisfied with their sex lives. A majority of study participants report frequent arousal and orgasm that continue into old age, despite low sexual desire.

More than half of all women surveyed said they were very or moderately satisfied with their sex life. The percentage of women who described themselves as sexually satisfied increased with age.

The median age in the study was 67 years and 63% were postmenopausal. Half the respondents who reported having a partner had been sexually active in the last 4 weeks. The likelihood of sexual activity declined with increasing age. The majority of the sexually active women, 67.1%, achieved orgasm most of the time or always. The youngest and oldest women in the study reported the highest frequency of orgasm satisfaction.

40% of all women stated that they never or almost never felt sexual desire, and one third of the sexually active women reported low sexual desire. 

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WHY SEX IS BETTER IN MY LATE FORTIES THAN WHEN I WAS IN MY TWENTIES

I’m 47 and I love sex! 
I’m happily married with three children, two of whom are teenagers, and I write sexual health and pleasure articles.
Here, I want to share my thoughts on why I’m having better sex now than when I was in my 20s.

This is to dispel the common view that by the time you hit your 40s, your sex life will be non existent. 


At the age of 20 I was clueless about sex, men and my body. Now, I’m a mature woman who loves sex and knows what she wants.
I get fed up reading negative articles about being premenopausal, something which I am. 

There are so many things you can do to have a better sex life but, for many women, they either haven’t experienced good sex or just don’t like it and, rather than exploring way in which to overcome any sexual problems they may have, they give up.


I know that many women who do enjoy sex experience a wide range of sexual problems from decreased libido to vaginal dryness - myself included - but there are things you can do to overcome these symptoms.
Thinking back to my childhood, my sex education was very limited.

I had a couple of boyfriends and a few one night stands but never had an orgasm as they were as inept at sex as me. 


After moving to London, I met my husband when I was 23. 
Sex wasn’t always great. I experienced vaginismus, painful contractions of the vagina, before having children.
Thankfully, this disappeared when I gave up my job and moved to New York.
I also had many bouts of thrush, cystitis and urinary tract infections, all of which made me wary about having sex, as they seemed to be sex-related. 
Over time, I learnt that scented products are problematic and that hormonal changes cause thrush -but no one ever offered this advice at the time. 
We also never used lubricants which would make sex more pleasurable.

These days, researching sex and writing about it has been an eye-opener and has made me realise just how lucky I am to have such a good sex life, compared to many people. 


It got me thinking about what makes sex so much better for me and my husband now we’re in our late 40s.
While writing about sex has made me more sexually confident, there are various other reasons...
WE HAVE SEX FREQUENTLY 
By this I meant three to four times a week -  but not always. 
It can be hard work motivating yourself at times, especially if you are tired or don’t feel in the mood/ 
But I do find myself getting ratty with everyone if we have a dry spell. 
We haven’t always had sex this frequently but by making an effort, I often find that the best sex happens when I’m not really in the mood.


You don’t even have to have coital sex, just try foreplay or cuddling and kissing. 
Sex toys are fun and there are great sex toys for men too. 
Sometimes coital sex isn’t possible but you can still enjoy amazing orgasms in other ways.
SEX IS GOOD FOR US 
Having sex makes me feel good.
The benefits of having sex are huge, from releasing feel good endorphins, to reducing stress, making you sleep better and giving you glowing skin, in addition to warding off sexual dysfunction problems.

Owning my company has made me aware of just how many problems people experience when it comes to sex.


So I now write health and pleasure articles, offering practical advice and tips about how to enjoy sexual intimacy whoever you are and whatever your, sexual problem, illness or disease.
I KNOW WHAT I LIKE AND WHAT MY HUSBAND LIKES IN BED 

Now I’m in my late 40s, I know what I’m doing when it comes to sex. 

I know what I like, what turns me off and how to bring pleasure to myself and my husband. 


Being together for over 24 years and married for 17 of them, we have had great sex in the past but are having even better sex now because we talk about it and show each other what we want, need and enjoy. 
Even now, it still surprises us when we discover that we both have the same thoughts about the same sexual thing or fantasy. 
I KNOW HOW TO LET GO 
Now I’m older, I find it easier to let go and enjoy sex, rather than filling my head with all the stuff I have to do or replaying situations and conversations from the day.
Sometimes it can be hard to switch off the chatter in your head. 
But I give myself a shake and start concentrating on the pleasurable sensations running through my body, not if I’ve done the packed lunches for my children, who are really old enough to do their own. 

Samantha Evans, co-founder of Jo Divine
Original and full article published by Healthista and Daily Mail
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    Habeeb Akande 

    Writer on race, sex, erotology and religious history.

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